Goddess Naa in "Two Random Shits"

I hate randomness. I hate the very nature of it. I could be traveling down the right side of the highway and some dumbass who finally spots his exit slides over from the middle lane quicker than James Brown at the last few seconds. How many times have you been focused on a requested task at work when a customer pops up like a toy fresh out of Roxy Raye's ass? I'll answer the question for you-- all the time. I hate it with a passion and I can't help but feel like the timing of randomness always flies in the face of any maintenance I am trying to exercise.

Why must people ask me the stupidest questions, then act like the shit is perfectly acceptable? Why can't I get bothered with random shit when I'm not trying to get my work done? The real world will have you asking more questions about randomness than Jada Kiss in a hip-hop song but fortunately for all EFRO Zone readers there is one form of randomness that I do endorse and Goddess Naa is to blame for all of the anxiety that I suffered from…

Stankyness is now airing on MTV2 Tuesdays at 6pm East Africa Time.

All of the petty customers, bad drivers and inconvenient news will evaporate from your head once you peep the random logs of dookie that Goddess Naa hot presses out of her African bootyhole hits your retinas. The name of the clip is called Two Random Shits and I swear to you it is the sexiest, quietest and probably funkiest form of randomness ever known to fetish mankind.

These two spur-of-the moment instances are ones that I will acknowledge and grade on a brown curve:

• This exotic goddess is a minimalist at heart (and inside her colon).

One thing that I'm not hard pressed to see as a fetish clip critic is theatrics. A script might add to the overall mood in things like traditional boy/girl porn, but you gotta realize that this genre of porn involves impending bowel movements. Our native domme comes in, cuts straight past the bullshit in both scenes and pours out some brown gold in quick fashion. She ain't got time for no sweet talk or allure, hell she doesn't even have time for pants as evidenced in these gifs. The only way Goddess Naa takes long in one batch of footage to do so is the amount of pressure it takes for her colon to force the dookie out of her cute poking lil bootyhole. Shee-it in the footage of the second bathroom trip, she's already mid-log before Goddess Naa can adjust the camera to get a good view from between her legs. It's the only mood deemed necessary.

• Niggas said that they fucked wit P.O.V. and Miss Naa listened.

It's really the only thing that throws me off about this video but this point offers bittersweet criticism. The upside-down view in the first scene still isn't one that I rock with. I wholly understand that these ladies who film their number twos don't really have the best opportunities to test out these angles and that's why I'll give this minor inconvenience a pass. Majority of the scat actresses barely make it home in time to make it to the bathroom so I especially appreciate Goddess Naa's patience in dealing with a crammed colon in order to set the camera (phone) up. That kind of gaffe keeps the homegrown vibe going in this video.

• Ozymandias watches The Watchmen and Goddess Naa defines "definition".

Adding to the practicality of that last point, it's true that these fetish ladies don't have a filming crew on deck (save for a baby daddy or fuck buddy). It's also true that not all of the ones who poop on camera have the best resolutions-- and even the highest-paid pornstars who crossover don't have a bigger budget for expenses. But Goddess Naa proves to be our exception to the rule in the case of her new release. Just as much in the past as in Two Random Shits, this ethnic thickie brings her usual grade of resolution that I assume comes from her smartphone. You get every gradation of light as it paints the inside of Naa's building, massively round butt cheeks and shiny rolls of doo-doo. It's not exactly the 4K used to capture the footage in movies like the TV commercials profess but I only need to catch the crinkles in her golden stool as it hits the hot, dry indigenous floor. They always send my sperms into orbit😣

EFRO Guide Magazine rates "Two Random Shits" at 5 stars.

Five stars. That's two and a half stars per BM and .13 stars for every bit of stool that Goddess Naa fresh squeezed outta her ass. And man did this chick put in the work; her first recording resulted in one hell of a marathon shit. The second one pales in comparison. Speaking of color, I swear Naa did so good of a job at planting sausage seeds that the delirium caused me to see the doo-doos in two different colors in two separate instances. The plate of logs appeared yellow in color after being born but then appeared to be brown when she moved her phone and showed the finished product from above. Maybe it's the automatic color settings in the smartphone, maybe it's because of the fact that all waste gets darker after being kicked out of the body like some people felt Will Smith shoulda got kicked out of the Oscars this year. Who knows? A good fetish worker will do that to you.

And most girls who flirt through boo-boo sext messages (or try it to fatten their bags) have a certain look they give the camera during funky airtime. It's usually the over-the-shoulder look back at the camera but our goddess of the moment gave us another look that's just as sexy: the between-the-legs look. I'm personally used to seeing it when the girl in the tape just bends over in front of the seat, the camera and the Lawd Almighty to let it go like Teddy Pendergrass. Goddess Naa manages to do it from the squat position. Ladies who do this might be checking to see if their stanky loads are hitting the intended target below, but I just think it's one of the sexiest lil nuances a woman can add to a scat clip and elevate it to nutbuster status. She's already queen of the frontal poop view-- now Naa can add another trick to her established skillset. Thank the heavens and the ancestors for her talents🙏🏾

COP THIS SHIT!!!